


Everything You Are

by Bandity



Series: Disappear Completely [2]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: But angst for everyone, Depression, Emotional insecurities, Gen, Grief, Hurt/Comfort, Langst, Talk of Addiction, Undefined eating disorders, discussion of drug use, grieving process
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-30
Updated: 2017-04-30
Packaged: 2018-10-26 00:43:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,508
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10775919
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bandity/pseuds/Bandity
Summary: Follow up to Disappear Completely. Spoilers for Season 2.Lance was getting better, he really was. But when faced with losing another team member, he might just end up back where he was before.





	Everything You Are

**Author's Note:**

> Some of this takes place after season 2. In my mind Shiro is not there for at least a few days. I have no idea how the new season is going to go, maybe they will get him back in about 20 minutes, maybe it will be months. I'm not sure. For the sake of the majority of this fic, we are assuming there is at least a bit of time when the team has to get along without him. 
> 
> I've gone through and fixed some little issues. I could tell how tired I was when I originally posted this. LOL.

Their most recent victory over a Galra fleet lead to the inhabitants of a previously Galra occupied planet giving them about an entire ship full of provisions as gifts of gratitude. They hadn’t stayed too long to celebrate with their new allies, wanting to move on to find other places that might need their assistance and help them gain an upper hand in the ongoing war.

While they moved along through space, the majority of the team was left going through boxes, crates and barrels full of mostly food. Hunk and Coran usually sorted the things like that, but this time Shiro, Keith and Lance were helping with a lot of the lifting. "Helping" was a loose way to describe it, as Lance kept finding things to do that were not actually that helpful. At one point, Lance and Hunk constructed a fort out of the supplies and then Lance promptly refused to let Keith in.

"I don't even want to go in there,” Keith said, flustered that he was being singled out, when he really was just trying to help move boxes.

"You're just _jealous_ ,” Lance taunted, peering out from one of the fort’s openings that he had created to be a window. Keith ignored him and continued working.

"Ah, Gentlemen," which was something Coran had taken to calling them when they were acting a little ridiculous. "How about we abandon this present fort and make a nice stack over on the far wall, that way we could fit in _all_ of the boxes."

"But we were going to call it Fort Coran," Lance whined and he actually pouted.

"Well… I suppose it is a fine structure.” Coran thoughtfully pulled at his moustache and looked way too pleased.

"I thought you wanted to call it Fort Lancelot," came Hunk's voice from somewhere within the fort.

"Hunk, shhhh!" Lance ducked back out of the window to have a word with his friend.

"It's in the way." Keith remarked, nudging one of the boxes with his foot.

"Don't kick it!" Lance yelled, popping up in a closer window and startling the red paladin.

"I barely touched it!"

"Keith, just let him have it." Shiro was beginning to regret offering to help and was thinking Pidge had the right idea by avoiding this task altogether. Keith rolled his eyes and went back to sorting boxes, though now he had to move around Fort Coran-Lancelot-Whatever.

Keith really didn't want to start a fight with Lance, especially since he was supposed to have meal duty with him later. Lance Watch had been going well lately. They had only had a few setbacks, just a few bad days. One particular bad incident was when Hunk remarked that Kaltenecker was technically made of hamburgers and wow, did anyone else miss earth's fast food? Lance, who had grown close to the cow and would often take Kaltenecker for walks whenever they landed somewhere with grass, didn't take Hunk's offhand comment well. He couldn’t eat all day after that. He made Hunk swear again and again that no matter what, they would never, ever, _ever_ eat Kaltenecker. Hunk had pinky swore and crossed his heart twice before Lance could eat again.

Now, the Lance Watch was usually only during lunch time. Unless he was having a bad day, Lance was able to eat breakfast and dinner with everyone with no problem. Lunch was just the most likely to be skipped, with all of them working on their own personal projects and activities, so lunch time with Lance remained a consistent pattern that they had fallen into.

“Hey, Coran!" Lance called from within his fort. "This barrel smells weird. I was using it as a chair, but... what is this?" Lance had obviously opened the barrel and was scrutinizing its contents. Coran poked his head through one of the windows of the fort.

"Ah!" Coran exclaimed, "Tiftian root, and a lot of it."

"Is it alright?" Everyone heard the slight nervousness on the edge of Lance's voice. It was a new plant and Lance had learned to avoid those with a resolute paranoia.

"Nothing to worry about!" Coran quickly assured him. "It's very common. It won't do anything to you. It's also called warrior's root. It's a... Well it used to be for when a warrior had to go on a long journey and there was very little to eat and drink. They wouldn't feel hunger or thirst, it gave them energy… kept them going."

"That sounds almost like a drug." Shiro commented as he quickly found a window to peer into in order to get a closer look. "Lance, move that out of there, we'll put it with the emergency supplies."

"It's not known to be addictive." Coran commented, obviously catching something of Shiro’s wariness.

"I was just using it as a chair," Lance sounded as though he was being wrongfully accused of something.

"I know. We don't need it though. We'll put it with the emergency supplies just in case." Shiro was speaking in that gentle voice he usually used on Lance’s bad days.

Lance shoved the lid back on and pushed the container out of the entranceway to Shiro.

"We'll find a better chair," Hunk reassured him. Lance had nodded and ducked back inside to continue reinforcing the fort.

"It's almost lunch," Keith reminded Shiro when he returned from the emergency supply area. 

Shiro hesitated a moment, switching his attention to the boxes he had been about to move, to Keith and then to the fort where Lance had been singing something familiar.

"Lance, five minutes and then we're taking a break for lunch,” Shiro called.

"Oh, Hunk and I can eat in here." Lance's head popped into the window again. "Oh wait, it's Keith today, Keith you can come in. I was just messing before."

"I don't even want to go in there." Keith repeated automatically.

Lance gave him a somewhat injured look that was quickly covered up with a smile.

"Suit yourself." Lance then disappeared into the fort and they could hear him mumbling something to Hunk. There was about a minute of quiet talking and Shiro was about to say something to Keith, when Hunk poked his face into the fort window and gave everyone a shy smile.

"Lance thinks everyone could have lunch in Fort Coran."

"We're not going to fit," Keith argued.

"Would it be alright?" Shiro asked. They had been having meal duty with Lance individually for a while now, but if Lance was ready to have every meal with everyone, Shiro didn’t want to dissuade him. Hunk nodded enthusiastically.

"Lance says he feels comfortable in the fort."

"Well, that's one way to keep us from taking it down." Shiro said with a sigh, but he smiled.

"We're not going to all fit,” Keith repeated. It would be cramped and how could Lance feel comfortable like that?

"You don’t have to, if you don’t want to." Shiro clapped Keith on the shoulder and the other boy nodded. If Lance didn’t need them individually anymore on Lance Watch, then fine, that was good.

This was good, this was progress.

* * *

 

The day after Shiro went missing, nobody ate anything.

There had been an initial manic sort of energy and panic followed by a pure exhaustion that overtook them all. After hours of fruitless searching, they had all gone to sleep or at least gone to their rooms to try and sleep, but Lance soon found himself walking the empty hallways. He was worrying and upset, just like they all were, but something in him just felt so lost. He realized it was because he had come to rely on Shiro a lot in the past few months. They all had, but Lance especially... Lance had cared too much, relied too much on another person. Now look where he was, wandering aimlessly, feeling hopeless and scared.  He thought about going to Blue, but at that moment, after they had fought so hard with their lions, Lance thought Blue would only remind him of the battle and what they had lost.

Unable to find comfort in the usual places, he walked the halls. He stopped when he felt a turning in his gut. Maybe it was hunger, maybe it was just a stomach ache brought on by grief. He couldn’t really tell the difference.

Lance found himself in the storeroom, his feet bringing him to the fort he had carefully made. Fort Coran-Lancelot had been forgotten about for a few weeks and it looked as though someone had removed some of the crates, causing one of the walls to have a huge gaping hole in it.

After a moment of just staring, he set to work, dragging boxes out from their organized stacks. It was difficult to do alone. Last time, Hunk and Shiro had helped him out a lot. The memory made Lance's heart clench and his breath caught in his throat.

_Ignore it. Ignore it._

Lance was hefting boxes and he was rebuilding the wall with a frantic energy now. He worked at a frenzied pace, allowing himself to become engrossed in the task.  When the wall was finally back in place, sweat was pouring down his face and soaking his shirt. He used a sleeve to wipe water from his eyes and he couldn't tell if it was sweat or tears.

_Don't think, just move, move, move._

Lance glanced around the fort to see what else needed work. He had forgotten to leave a window in his new wall, but that didn't matter so much anymore. The large crate they had used as a table was still there, but the barrel chairs had gone missing. Probably pilfered for supplies at some point. He exited his fort and looked for new chairs.

It wasn't long before Lance found his way to the emergency supplies. He grabbed that barrel, the one that smelled odd and had been his first choice for a chair anyway, and he rolled it all the way back to the fort.

Once it was in place, beside the makeshift table, Lance lay down on the floor and breathed heavily, exhausted over the exertion. He had started to feel way too warm, but as he lay there, surrounded by his walls and staring up at the open ceiling, he felt a kind of numbness overtake him. Maybe he could sleep now. If he slept, he at least wouldn't have to feel anything anymore, even if it was just for a little while.

* * *

 

Lance awoke suddenly, alone and now freezing cold on the metal floor. He was so thirsty; his throat and mouth feeling dry and as though it was filled with cotton. His head pounded. Lance thought it felt like the flu. That would just be his luck; coming down with space flu, when no one had time to worry about something so stupid. He scrubbed at his face and told himself he needed to get up. He needed to help. He needed to at least get something to drink from the kitchen. But his arms were sore and he just couldn't convince himself that anything was worth moving. He turned his head slowly and his eyes landed on his barrel chair.

Oh.

Coran had said something about that. Those root things could take away thirst. He had been so afraid of anything new for such a long time, but if they really could quench his thirst and he could just stay here for a little while longer, maybe it was worth the risk.

 _Shiro wouldn't like it,_ the thought crossed his mind absently and made Lance's face screw up in a surprising kind of anger.

 _Shiro's_ not _here_.

* * *

 

Hunk was in the kitchen, pulling items from cabinets, automatically reaching for the ones placed on the right because those had been team tested and Lance approved. He had woken up with an empty feeling in his gut and he had assumed it was hunger, though he suspected it was just a sense of loss gnawing at his insides.

Still, it was good to do _something_ and making food for everyone was something he could do to help.

He had allowed himself to fall into the rhythm of his task and it took him a moment to realize that Pidge had crept into the room and was watching him with a slightly dazed look.

"Hey," Hunk said flatly.

"Hey," Pidge replied, sounding half asleep. "Need help?"

Hunk smiled gently and nodded towards a bowl. He wasn't the only one that needed to keep busy.

"Wanna stir?"

Pidge nodded and the two of them worked side by side quietly, finding a fragile peace in the mundanity of the everyday tasks.

* * *

 

Lance was determined to visit Blue. But on his way, he felt the need to walk by the Black Lion’s hangar. Maybe he was trying to prove to himself that he wasn’t a coward, but something just made him want to check on the other Lion. He had found enough courage now to visit Blue and then he thought he could maybe sort some things out in his head. Maybe he would feel _better_ if he could just talk to Blue. But first, he had to do this… _Just check on the Black Lion, just walk past, be quick, be quick..._

"Keith?"

Lance wasn’t quick enough. He stopped in his tracks, finding the other boy sitting against one of the Black Lion's paws. Keith had circles under his eyes and he looked as though he had been running his fingers through his hair desperately.

"You look awful." Lance blurted out.  Keith was staring at him as though he wasn't quite seeing him. It was worrying. "Have you slept?" Lance tried in a careful tone.

Keith shook his head, but still said nothing and Lance thought, well, he thought that it looked like the other boy had been _crying_. As hurt and upset as Lance was, he knew that Keith must be just as hurt and upset, maybe even more so. Lance hesitantly moved forward until he was standing right in front of Keith.

"What are you-can I sit down?-What are you doing here?" Lance had plopped himself on the floor without waiting for an answer to his middle question and just looked at Keith with wide eyes.

"Nothing." Keith finally spoke. "Just talking, trying to see if I could…" Keith made a vague wave upwards, toward the Black Lion. "Feels like nobody's home though."

"Maybe the Black Lion doesn't feel like talking."

Keith shut his eyes and shrugged.

"Did you sleep at all?"

"No," Keith answered after a moment, "did you?" Keith’s eyes opened and he was staring at Lance with a forced focus.

"A little."

Keith made a noise in the back of his throat, but didn't respond otherwise. Lance shifted in the silence, trying to figure out what else to say. 

"Why are you down here?" Keith finally asked, when he realized Lance wasn’t going to just leave him alone.

"I was going to go talk to Blue, but I thought I should just check… You should go sleep. You look like you need it."

"Did you eat?"

"A little," Lance answered quietly.

"Well, that’s… good." Keith sighed and then pushed himself up with great difficulty. He stumbled when his legs refused to work after being kept still for so long. Lance stood up quickly and grabbed his arm.

"No, I don't want your help.” Keith shrugged off Lance’s hand, though the action almost made him fall to the floor. Lance shrank away, drawing in on himself. 

"I don't need your help." Keith mumbled, but now he was looking up at the Black Lion's unmoving jaw and Lance thought that the comment hadn't been directed at him.

Keith blinked slowly and turned back to Lance.

"Sorry," Keith muttered, because Lance had that wounded look on his face that meant Keith should apologize, even if Keith wasn't sure what he had said to upset him now. Keith could almost hear Shiro telling him to be careful in that warning tone that he sometimes got. Wow, this was all so unbelievably horrible, like the worst nightmares.  

"Are you... alright?" Lance asked quietly.

"I don't think so…” But Keith couldn’t continue, he couldn’t put this kind of pressure on Lance. Lance already had his own issues to worry about. “Yeah, I'm alright,” Keith amended. “I'm going to try and sleep. Go talk to Blue, you'll feel better."

Lance let him walk away, though he still worried as he watched Keith sway on his feet. Lance was distracted from his concern by a sudden, slight tugging he felt at his heart and he turned and followed the feeling to Blue’s hangar. She was there, waiting patiently for him. Without another thought, Lance found himself jogging forward. He skidded to a stop and quickly leaned against one of Blue’s cool paws.

"I'm alright, sorry to worry you," he said breathlessly. Now that he was here, he was beginning to feel just a tiny bit more grounded. He was safe… he would be alright.

* * *

 

Hunk had made the closest thing to pancakes that he could make. They tasted good and it was really too bad that they were being eaten so unenthusiastically. Coran said that they were delicious, but the rest of the meal was finished in silence. Allura had made an appearance, eaten a little and then gone back to the bridge. Coran told them that she hadn’t slept much; instead she had spent most of her time still looking for evidence of their missing team member.

Hunk had set food aside for Keith and Lance, but neither of them showed up.

"Should we go look for them?" Pidge asked.

"I don't want to wake them if they're sleeping." Hunk replied. It was past what they would have considered to be morning, but they had probably needed the rest.

"Give them a little more time. I'm sure they will turn up before lunch." Coran, always choosing to be optimistic.

 Hunk glanced at Pidge with a worried look. He wanted to be optimistic, but he felt worry grip his mind. Lance had just been really starting to get better, this was probably seriously messing with his mind.

“We’ll give them til lunch,” Pidge said with a decisive nod.

Hunk nodded in agreement.

* * *

 

When Keith finally showed up, it was just past lunch time and he was still half asleep. He was fighting back a headache when he fell into a chair at the table. Without looking around, he leaned forward and cradled his head in his arms. Hunk slid a plate of reheated pancakes towards his elbow. It took a moment for Keith to process he was being offered food. He sat up enough to stab at them with a fork for a moment. Eventually, he sat up fully and scrubbed hard at his eyes. He cleared his throat and glanced around to see Hunk and Coran looking at him with concern. That’s not the way it was supposed to be. They weren’t supposed to be worried about _him_.  

"Did... Did everyone eat?" Because that was _his_ job now, right? To make sure everyone was taken care of?

"I did, Pidge did. Lance hasn't come up yet. Pidge went to go get him," Hunk reported.

"Lance was with Blue a few hours ago. Maybe he's still there,” Keith offered, though that seemed like a long time to be talking to Blue, but this was Lance. Lance loved talking to his Lion.

At that moment, Pidge entered the room, looking bothered. Hunk walked over to meet their smallest team member.

"What happened? Did you find him?"

"I did," Pidge started, glancing at Keith for a moment, "but I think you should come help me. He's acting… weird."

Keith stood up abruptly, food completely forgotten and he followed Pidge and Hunk out of the dining area without hesitation.

* * *

 

Lance was sitting in the cockpit talking to Blue. In fact he had been talking to Blue for hours, once he started, he couldn't stop himself. It wasn't too unusual, he loved spending time with his Lion. The others had once joked that Lance had finally found a captive audience who couldn’t just walk away from him. But now he was just saying _everything_ that came into his mind, which felt like the first time he had done that in his life. Usually he was careful, careful not to say too much, careful not to upset anyone with his gloomier thoughts and feelings. He had opened up to his team a little, he had let them take care of him and Shiro... Shiro looked out for him.

"Could I have done anything to save him?" Lance whispered. He felt his energy leave him all at once. For a while there he had felt like he could do this, like he could be with Blue and not think about the battle they had fought, not think about who they had lost. But it wasn't the same. He could talk and talk, but it wouldn't change anything, Shiro was still gone.

It was this onslaught of grief that Lance was working through when he realized Pidge was outside, trying to talk to him. He pressed an intercom button that would allow them to have a conversation.

"Lance!" Pidge called. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine." Lance answered automatically. He thought his voice sounded hollow though.

"Do you want me to bring you lunch? You can eat here if you want."

"I'm not hungry," Lance answered honestly.

"Right," Pidge spoke carefully, "but you should eat something still."

"It's not your turn." There was a click that signaled the communication channel had been turned off.

"Lance!" Pidge was taken by surprise. Lance hadn't sounded angry exactly, but he was definitely upset if he could be that abrupt with a friend.

Feeling a bit lost and wishing Shiro was there to help, Pidge left to find reinforcements. There was no way Lance was going to be allowed to push them all away, they couldn't let it happen. Pidge already felt bad about losing track of him for over a day. Together, they could help, even if he didn't seem to want it.

* * *

 

When Coran, Hunk, Pidge and Keith arrived all at the same time, Lance sighed. He hadn’t wanted to see them all right now, but he figured it was inevitable. He wiped at his eyes and cleared his throat before pushing the intercom button again.

"Lance!" Hunk was calling, "Hey, you wanna come out and talk, maybe?"

"It's not your turn," Lance mumbled.

"Whose turn is it?" Hunk whispered loudly. There was a pause and more whispers as Pidge began trying to remember who had been on Lance Watch last. The last time, it had been Keith so...

"Shiro." Keith said quietly. "It's Shiro's turn."

Everyone went silent.

"Lance," Coran finally spoke up. "Look, I know this is hard, but Shiro's turn is going to be skipped for now. If you want, I can sit with you, my boy."

"Or me!" Hunk volunteered eagerly. "I would have been next after, so it makes sense."

"You don't need to do that," Lance finally spoke again. He couldn't take it anymore, obviously, they weren't leaving and he wasn't going to be able to seclude himself any longer. Shiro wouldn't have left him alone either. Lance's stomach clenched at the thought. But Shiro _had_ left him alone.

Lance felt something brush against his mind. Something like a gentle chastisement. Blue was talking to him now, and Lance understood the message perfectly. _Shiro would never leave you by choice._

Lance felt overwhelmed at the thought and the warmth that he felt spreading like the gentlest kind of love and caring, it felt like his home, his family, his mother... and his team.

Tears began to form in his eyes and he was scrabbling now to get out of the cockpit. It was all a blur as his feet reacted slowly and he was stumbling towards his teammates. They called his name and he would have landed on the floor, if it wasn't for Hunk catching him.

He was sobbing suddenly and where had this even come from? He was supposed to be better than this. But Hunk patted his back, told him it would be alright and didn't seem to be disgusted by Lance’s display of weakness or the tears and snot that were surely soaking his shirt.

They took turns saying encouraging things and Coran gave him his handkerchief to clean his face with. After several minutes of this, he felt lighter and way too exhausted to even keep crying. His breathing evened out as he found that he was out of tears for the moment. He pushed himself away from Hunk and tried to regain his composure.

"Sorry," he mumbled, but Hunk just gave him his own teary smile.

"No worries. We're all going through it, y'know?"

Pidge nodded in agreement and reached over to wrap a small arm around Lance.

"You had me worried," Pidge admitted quietly.

"Sorry," Lance said again. He meant it, he didn't want them to worry. He hated that he made them worry. Pidge offered him a sad smile. Maybe someday he would stop always apologizing for his emotions, but it wouldn't be now.

"I can bring food here. It will be a picnic, alright?" Hunk asked as he began to move away, but Lance shook his head.

"I'm really not hungry. Seriously. I'm not... making it up."

"We know you're not making it up, but you still need to eat something." Coran sounded reasonable and calm, even though Lance's refusal to eat was starting to alarm them all a little.

"It's not like before. I'm really not hungry... I'm just tired." It seemed like a good excuse, one they might let him get away with.

They all studied him for a minute, eventually they seemed to decide that Lance might need the rest and they could tackle the issue again in a few hours. They never got anywhere by _forcing_ Lance to do anything. Shiro had understood that too.  

After promising to get some rest and being clapped on the back by Hunk, Lance was allowed to head back to his room while the others reluctantly set off towards their own destinations.

"We'll try at dinner time." Coran had said and it seemed as good a plan as any.

Lance was walking alone now, debating on whether to actually go back to his room or to the fort. After some thought, he started to turn down the corridor that lead to the supply room when he felt an odd pulling sensation by his hip and he turned to see Keith, standing very close and holding up a Tiftian root. It must have been sticking out of his pocket, from when he had shoved a handful of them there earlier.

Keith's eyes were narrowed and he actually looked pretty pissed off.

"Keith!" Lance exclaimed. "Where did you come from?"

"I've been walking behind you this whole time. What the hell are you doing, Lance?" He demanded. Lance just stared with his mouth hanging open.

"You're not hungry because you ate some of these things." Keith was right, he knew he was right.

"I wasn't really thinking about it. I was just thirsty and it was close by."

"What if you had been allergic to it? We've been double checking our food for months and you just go and eat something that nobody else has tried, that Shiro didn't even want anyone to have in the first place!"

"It was fine!” Lance raised his voice to match the other boy’s. “And it worked. I'm not hungry or thirsty and it gave me the energy to find _you_ when you were not sleeping and trying to talk to the Black Lion."

"That's not the point. You _need_ to eat. You can't do this."

"I wasn't thinking, alright? Just drop it." Lance turned to walk away, but Keith grabbed his shoulder.

"No, Shiro wouldn't have let you-“

"You're not Shiro!" Lance yelled loudly.

The silence that followed that remark was tense. The hurt on Keith's face was very real and Lance quickly floundered for an apology. He had gotten too angry too quickly and he was lashing out like an idiot.

 "You think I don't know that?" Keith bit out. Keith wanted to storm away, he couldn't do this, it was too hard. But something held him in place. This was his team. This was Lance. He couldn't turn his back on him, he needed to calm down, they needed to figure this out now or they probably never would.

"Sorry," he mumbled. "I shouldn't have been that angry. I just... Lance, you know you can't do this, right? This will just put you back to where you were."

"It's not addictive. Coran said so."

"To him it's not. But to humans? We don't know that. It's why Shiro didn't want it anywhere near us."

"I hadn't… thought about it like that."

"Just don't eat anymore."

"Alright,” Lance said after a moment.

"Promise, Lance."

"It did make me feel better for a while." Lance had a thoughtful expression, remembering how it was only after he had eaten some of the root that he felt he could face the Lions again.

"Lance... Please." Keith didn’t say please often and he didn’t usually ever sound this worried over something. Lance couldn’t stand that pleading tone.

Lance hunched his shoulders and was then digging through his pockets. He came up with a fistful of the root and handed it to Keith.

"I promise," Lance said quietly. Keith put the roots away in his own pocket; he would throw them away later.

"Thank you."

There was a long moment of silence as they both shifted uncomfortably from one foot to another.

"Where were you going anyway?" Keith finally asked, genuinely curious. Lance’s room wasn’t this way. 

"Oh, Fort Coran."

"Oh," Keith stated, remembering the stack of boxes that Lance was so oddly fond of.

"You… want to come with?" Lance asked hesitantly. Keith didn’t know what to say. They had just been fighting, but now Lance was acting like Keith was the one who needed to be watched over.

"Do you want me to?"

"You just look like you don't want to be alone." Lance shrugged. "You can throw out the rest of that stuff. I have a whole chair full."

"A chair… alright..."

“Great,” Lance gave Keith a wide grin before leading the way to the supply room.

* * *

 

"I don't think I see the appeal in this."

Keith was lying on the bare floor staring up at the ceiling of the storage room. Lance was stretched out several feet away, with his arms folded behind his head. The chair of Tiftian root had been removed from the fort and Keith was planning on jettisoning the whole thing out to space when he got the chance. 

"Didn't you ever build a fort in your room or in your backyard?" Lance asked with a sigh.

"No..." Keith answered slowly.

Lance took a deep breath.

"It's about having a place of your own. Some place safe I guess."

"There was this little cabinet I used to hide in sometimes, but once someone put something in front of it and I couldn’t get out."

Lance swore softly under his breath.

"Keith... That's... OK, it's like that, but not horrible." Lance was starting to understand why Keith hadn’t been a fan of the fort in the beginning. He became determined to fix this, no way was he going to let his fort be compared to a cupboard from Keith’s questionable childhood.

"Look when we eat in here, you'll see. It's cool, OK?"

"It's not my turn though," Keith said after a moment.

"Yeah, I know, but.... Keith have _you_ eaten anything yet?"

Keith blinked in surprise and he remembered back to sitting in the Black Lion's hangar and feeling too sick to think about food. Then there was the lunch that he had left and forgotten about when he had heard Lance needed help…

"I... didn't. I guess I forgot."

"Well, from now on you'll just have to take Shiro's turn until we get him back. Unless you don't want to?" Lance sounded unsure and young; too young to be in a war. Maybe they were both too young for this.

"Until we get him back," Keith whispered.

"Yeah." Lance sounded distant, like he was starting to fall asleep.

"Yeah, I can do that."

Lance hummed in response and Keith wondered if he was really going to be able to sleep on the floor like that. Keith turned his head and stared back up at the bare ceiling. An image of the Black Lion drifted through his mind. Keith was surprised by the calmness that settled inside of his chest then. In that moment, he really felt like they might be alright.

Maybe the fort wasn't so bad after all.

**Author's Note:**

> Title is from This Isn't Everything You Are by Snow Patrol. 
> 
> Just take the hand that's offered, and hold on tight  
> This isn't everything you are  
> There's joy not far from here, I know there is  
> This isn't everything you are
> 
> I should have been doing homework, but I wanted to post this when Disappear Completely got 1000 Hits. As I post this, Disappear Completely has 1001 Hits. Which amazes me. So thank you all for that. Now, really, I need to take a break and do my homework. Leave me a comment!
> 
> UPDATE: I was trying to figure out what was bothering me about this story and I think I realized that it is supposed to have at least one more chapter. I don't know when and I'm not completely settled on what it will contain, but it will happen at some point. Thanks for reading!


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